i logged in and out of blogger several times over the last few days, in contemplation of what to write. something hit me; friendship. and at this point you (my reader) would normally either get a sense of love, or a sense of tragedy. maybe. but more than anything, it's guilt that pushes my fingers to type away furiously at the keypad.
mambo on wednesday taught me something. i am capable of being terribly selfish. i am ashamed for ditching my friend(s) out in the open sea. no matter how silly friends behave, no matter how much you feel like throwing them a punch, it just isn't right to walk out. tolerance. i need more of that. right. i don't owe them anything; the build up of anger and frustration. the breaking point. these justifications do not suffice. even if my good intentions remain unappreciated, even if... there are no even ifs. walking out wasn't right. i am not proud of it.
photos will be up soon.
she waxed lyrical - 10:58 PM
Comments:
no. you weren't selfish. please. you just had had enough of the way we were all behaving lah. i should have been there to help you. but i was intent on having a good time, and there were reasons why i drank a tad bit too much lah. yeap.
but take heart, we still love you =)) and i wanna tan soo fucking badly. SHIT! NEXT FRIDAY OK! i don't give a fuck already lah. i need to not be yellow anymore =( the sun today looks veryveryvery orgasmic =( but i have to go meet denzil later.
and how should i spend my birthday r? i'm fucking lazy to plan.
and sorry for this tag being soo darn vulgar. hahaha. i'm damn tired lah. pfft.